 |
| He doesn't play a part in the story but he IS the Mysterious Mr. Max. |
On a bright summer day a young kitty named Meow sat near by a bluish green stream. With a whoosh the stream exploded, and she was sucked in! Luckily she loved water.
Meeoww! she cried.
She paddled frantically but it was no use.
Help! She mewed.
Then she found herself on a marble floor. A strange cat came up to her. It had no fur! Her little green eyes grew round.
She tried to say, Are you the rarooda cats whose voices were silenced long ago? But she couldn't.
One day later….she had explored the town a little, and she learned that they communicated by writing.
Then a medallion fell from the sky. The medallion spoke to her. You’re the right person to save these cats’ meows. As long as you keep me these cats will be able to meow. But if you lose me, these cats will be silent again. I’ve been looking for the right person for years. I know you will be responsible enough to meet this challenge.
THE END
What an interesting story! I love the alliteration in the title. Perhaps what is most sophisticated about the writing, though, is the way you show the characters' emotions rather than simply telling us. For example, when you say that Meow's eyes grew round, we can feel the surprise (and maybe even a bit of fear) as if we are right there next to her -- that's so much more exciting than just telling us what she felt! If you choose to expand the story (since I would be delighted to read more), perhaps you can grow the middle part of the story by showing us how not being able to meow made life difficult for the cats, really develop that problem more. If you did, we readers would be in an even better position to cheer for Meow on her quest and celebrate this special honor given to her.
ReplyDeleteI would like to know what made this cat so special that the medallion choose her?
ReplyDelete